Friday, June 19, 2009

Ode to Fathers Everywhere


Father's Day...

When this time of year comes around, panic sets in. For years, I have never known what to get my dad (for any holiday, really). He has everything. Anything he doesn't have, he will buy for himself the day before the holiday. I have given some admittedly awful gifts. This year I think I've got it though. (I say that every year). My sister and I decided to take pictures of the kids!

This little adventure was very funny. I think we ironed forty pieces of clothing (each)! There was a lot of shopping for the clothes, wiping faces, combing hair, rewiping faces, etc. And that was before we even got there.

We decided to go to a nearby park. As soon as we got out of the car, the chaos began. I immediately offered ice cream to any "obediant" souls. No one responded in the appropriate manner, so that's when the YELLING began. I'll admit that any passersby might have been slightly concerned about the treatment of these children. There were some slivers (we insisted they be barefoot) and some tears (the sun was in their eyes even though it was very cloudy) and some running away (they're fast). We ended up with some very funny outtakes. I'll post those another time.

This picture is one of my favories.


My children could not be gathered at the same time. I kind of like the outcome though.


There was lots of attitude to go around!







Sunday, June 14, 2009

I Fought the Law

Remember my speeding ticket? It's still a sore subject. I finally went to my court appointment to "offer an explanation." I listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and the theme song from Karate Kid Part 2 on the drive. I was pumped. I mulled over some possible scenarios/speeches and I was going to wing it when I got there. WELL, when I did get there, all that went out the window. I guess I thought there was going to be a court where people like me would be taking care of simple things like traffic tickets and we would be separate from the KILLERS and other COMPLETELY PSYCHO people. Um, not quite. I came very close to wetting my pants. They had us all together in one waiting area and trust me when I say I WAS THE ONLY ONE THERE FOR A SPEEDING TICKET! I was SO glad that I hadn't brought the kids with me.

So, the outcome was that I had to pay the fine and I'm on probation for one year. I was too chicken to ask for anything else. As long as I don't get another speeding ticket before June 10, 2010, it will not go on my record. I ran out of there as if the building was on fire. I hope never to return.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Status and Topless Moment

The house is for sale. So far, no one has come to see it.

I want the house to appear as though no one lives here. My "practice drills" have not produced those results. I would like for someone to come look at the house (and no, I do not mean people I know) just to see how prepared I will be. For some reason there is a certain amount of dread associated with the first showing.

The photo below demonstrates why I am out of my league when it comes to keeping the house spotless. This same incident is repeated 2-4 times each and every day. At least the little cherub weighs 20.0 lbs, FINALLY!!! (Unofficially, on my home scale). I have been doing a great deal of cleaning the past several days. Now, I'm the kind who uses the most toxic cleaning agents known to man. I find comfort in their strong scents. One time in college I got Shower Power (a very toxic cleaning agent) in my eye. I had to have my eye flushed at the doctor. Anyhoo...yesterday I was cleaning the shower with a bleach cleaner. I didn't want it to bleach my shirt, so I took my shirt off. I had my shirt sitting in the hallway outside the bathroom. I walked downstairs to get another cleaning rag. Just at that moment, as luck would have it, someone knocked at my door. Usually I just wouldn't answer it, but my door was open so whoever was there could see that I was home. I whispered to my four year old that I needed him to get the door since I didn't have a shirt on. I put a decorative pillow in front of me and dashed up the stairs to quickly get my shirt. The following is the conversation that took place in the twenty seconds it took me to put on my shirt:

Man At Door: "Is your mom here?"

Four Year Old: "Yes, but she doesn't have a shirt on."

Man At Door: "Should I come back another time?"

Four Year Old: "Yes, if you don't want to see my mom naked."

At that point, I quickly came around the corner FULLY DRESSED. I tried not to look out of breath, hoping he would think the four year old was making up a story or something. He (man at door) looked slightly scared!

Thursday, June 4, 2009

Updates

Oh, life just cruises on by...

I'm SOOOO sick of the "house stuff." No, it's not on the market yet. Yes, we're going to put it on the market on Monday. Every day has been filled with the following:

1. Cleaning.
2. Instructing offspring not to touch/take out/move/disturb anything. Sounds like fun for them, doesn't it? I'm sure they've put the word on the street that they're looking for new digs.
3. Cleaning.
4. Yard work.
5. Cleaning.
6. Eating sandwiches or some such "non-cooked" food on paper plates.

Then we go to bed and start all over the next day.

Every day my four year old looks out the window to see if our house "...is on sale." Bless his little heart, he's ready for the whole thing to be done. I think he's also secretly hoping he doesn't have to share a room with his sister too much longer.

Thursday, May 14, 2009

Squirrels

Oh, squirrels. Once upon a time they were cute little animals that climb trees and store nuts for winter. When we lived in student housing, my opinion of squirrels changed dramatically. They became equal to rats, in my opinion. They were EVERYWHERE. I was always scared to take the garbage out during those days. I never knew if one was going to jump out at me. Anyone remember that? Anyway, I had another COMPLETELY gross squirrel moment yesterday. I was mowing the "never used" part of our backyard (behind the fence) when I RAN OVER a squirrel. This squirrel had died long ago, but its tail was still completely in tact. BLECH!!! I DO NOT LIKE SQUIRRELS!!!

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Mother's Day...

I picked out my own Mother's Day present this year. I designed this necklace. I love it because I think it sums up motherhood. It is very "beat up." Sound familiar? It's not perfect. Hmmm. It was made with love (not by me, although I'm learning how). I especially love the "happy mom" part. The world needs more happy moms!!! And when I forget that I'm happy, I reach up and touch it and it reminds me to enjoy the experience.

I know so many great, happy moms! Enjoy Mother's Day!!! I wish you lots of cuddly kid time!

Saturday, May 2, 2009

Big Day

Friday was a big day! We went to the American Girl store for national Stop the Bullying Day. It was so much fun! S was recognized as one of the national poster winners. They treated her like a queen... We enjoyed lunch in the American Girl Bistro. Everyone ate with the doll of their choice. (Even the boys were really into it...but don't tell them I said that.)


I didn't want to leave the store. The dolls are so cute and everything is so tiny. I think I would squeal a lot if I worked there.
My baby LOVED the babies!!! He was so cute.

The American Girl event staff were so kind to us. They set up a private area for us and had the poster displayed at our table. There were lots of smiles.